SOS Hollywood
by Chantelle-Musique
Summary: Will the castaways get rescued by a Hollwood movie scout?
1. The News

The Scout  
  
Mr. and Mrs. Howell layed suning with a wet, cool, pineapple that was filled with Mary  
  
Anne's punch. They were listening to a lovely selection of Hawaiin songs when Gilligan  
  
came skipping a long to tell them that the Skipper was going to have a birthday party, but  
  
that it would be a surprise. Alas, his footing was lost to a big rock just as he was nearing  
  
the two lounge chairs and his fall took away the lovely Hawaiin music and replaced it  
  
with a news station.   
  
"Gilligan!" hollered Mr Howell,"Why don't you watch where you are going!?"  
  
"I was watching mr Howell, I was going over to tell you about Skippers birthday party...  
  
but dont say anything it is a surprise."  
  
"Oh Thurston, we are going to have a party and I have punch all over my dress, what am  
  
I going to wear?" Mrs. Howel continued to dab away the red spot hopelessly implanted  
  
on her blouse.  
  
"Don't worry Mrs. Howell..... I can......"  
  
"Hush, hush my boy"  
  
The news announcer continued his drone.  
  
"In local news today, Hollywood movie producers are scouting by air. They are  
  
in search of an Island for a movie in the works. The movie will be called 'Island of the  
  
big bafoons'. Local talents are welcome to audition for any and all roles "  
  
"Gilligan, Lovey, do you know what this means?"  
  
"That we can audition to be the bafoons?"  
  
"No Gilligan," Mrs. Howell continued with excitment, "It means there will a plane flying  
  
over us soon!"  
  
"We have to tell the others," Mr. Howell thought out loud, rising from his lounge chair  
  
and nearly knocking the punch over the rest of his wifes blouse.  
  
"Oh Thurston, I wont have to worry about what to wear for Skippers birthday party after  
  
all. I have my whole wardrobe back home!"  
  
"Yeah Mrs Howell...... maybe you could audition for one of the bafoons too."  
  
"Oh Gilligan you are already doing a great job of being a bafoon we have to go tell  
  
everyone a plane will be coming!" 


	2. The Plan

The Scout Chapter 2  
  
Everyone came gathering out of their huts as the cries and shouts of a plane coming filled  
  
the island air. The Professor looked a bit incredulous.  
  
"What makes you think so Mr. Howell?" The Professor analyzed the source of the  
  
information.  
  
"We heard it on the radio, A plane from Hollywood is scouting for a movie location  
  
among the islands!"  
  
Ginger preened breathlessly;  
  
"A movie....... a rescue...... maybe we will be rescued soon enough to audition!"  
  
"Sure"' Gilligan nodded innocently " They need lots of bafoons"  
  
Ginger scowled in disgust and Mary Anne intervened;  
  
"Gilligaaaan "  
  
Skipper suddenly realized his position.  
  
"Listen..... we dont have much time..... we need to build a signal flare! Men, we need to  
  
fell some trees to make a sign...... ladies help us shape the logs into letter that say......  
  
HOLLYWOOD   
  
HELP  
  
They cant possibly miss that!"  
  
"Skippers right....... If we hurry we can have the sign burning by dark," The Proffesor  
  
agreed.  
  
Everyone rushed off to gather necessary tools and clothes leaving only Gilligan behind.   
  
Skipper noticed his little buddy was missing and turned back.  
  
"Gilligan what are you doing"  
  
"I am trying to decide which tree to chop down skipper..... this one has coconuts on it,  
  
and this one is too big."  
  
"Gilligan..... isnt there something you need to chop down the tree first?"' Skipper  
  
counsceled with exaggerated patience.  
  
"Sure Skipper."  
  
"And what is that little buddy?"  
  
"I could use a glass of Mary Annes punch "  
  
Skipper lost his cool.......   
  
"I'll punch youuuu."  
  
Skipper took off his hat and ran for Gilligan, who ran for the hut with Skipper trotting  
  
behind angrily swatting with his cap. 


	3. In Action

Chapter 3  
  
The women had arrived at the shore and began lining the sand with their feet. No  
  
logs had arrived yet....... and Mrs. Howell promised to return with bananas and fish.  
  
"I'll work on the word Hollywood Mary Anne...... and then I'll work on choosing a  
  
leading man for my next movie," Ginger was elated.  
  
Mary Anne was running a mixture of feelings.  
  
"Oh Ginger...... a real rescue..... gee its great but I am going to miss having you for a  
  
room mate!"  
  
"Ohhhh Mary Anne..... dont you worry, I can always send you tickets to come and see  
  
me any time you wish!"  
  
The two roomies stopped to embrace, shortened by the mens shout of incoming trees.  
  
Here are the first three ladies!   
  
"That will make the H Ginger pondered, unless we use them for two L s and part of the  
  
Y. The men groaned at the thought of how many trees were left to fall.  
  
"Where is Lovey?" Mr. Howell demanded looking around for his wife.  
  
"She is helping with dinner,," Mary Anne supplied.  
  
" Lovey ? Cooking ? And here I am chopping."  
  
.....Mr. Howell looked at his hands, red and sore.  
  
"Oh the painnn."  
  
Skipper hailed the urgency of their time shortage.  
  
"Come on Mr. Howell, if you want a plane ride out of here , we all have to help."  
  
"Couldn't I just pay the boy to do my share?" Mr. Howell said with a curled  
  
sophisticated lip  
  
Everyone stared dissapprovingly.  
  
"What oh then....... count me in." 


	4. Hollywood HELP

Chapter 4  
  
Everyone looked exhausted as the last logs were put into place.  
  
Hollywood Help was now in place....... and loaded with fish oil that the Professor had  
  
been using to help ignite their torches at night.   
  
"How long will the oil keep those logs burning Professor?"  
  
"Long enough for the plane to notice them Skipper...... as long as we wait to light them  
  
till we see the plane..... everyone will need a torch to get them going when we hear the  
  
engine."  
  
"So we have to stay here the whole time?" Gilligan asked a little worn.   
  
"Yes Gilligan, if we want to make sure and catch that ride back to civilization," the  
  
Professor put a hand on his tired shoulder.  
  
Gilligan sighed and resumed eating the fish and banana concoction that Mrs. Howell was  
  
dishing up with pride. Everyone tried not to show Mrs. Howell just how bad her first  
  
attempt at cooking without help turned out. Gilligan kept shooing the same fly away  
  
from his fruit.   
  
"Man that fly sure buzzes loud," Gilligan mentioned, still swatting over his food rather  
  
than eating it:"  
  
"That's no fly buzzing little buddy, that's our rescue buzzing!"  
  
"Skipper we can't get off this island using flies."  
  
"No Gilligan," grunted the skipper, whopping Gilligan rather than the fly with his hat  
  
once. "Its the plane......it's coming this way! Get your torches everyone!"   
  
Everyone broke into a run for their torch and headed for their section of the Hoolywood  
  
Help letters. Their fervorous days work was finally coming to a fruition. The letters  
  
began to flare up bit by bit. Gilligan had finished his L of help and was running to light  
  
the P. Was it subconscious? P standing for Pants? Gilligan managed to light his trousers  
  
along with the long line of the P. As he jumped up and down and zig zagged to get the  
  
blaze out...... Gilligan began knocking the unlit portion of the P out of place. Only the  
  
long line was burning, as was Gilligan, who ran into the lagoon's water for relief.   
  
Gilligan stood emitting a sigh of relief as the producer's plane flew over head.  
  
The scout could not help but notice the burning letters before him.   
  
"Hollywood Hell?" he asked his co pilot in disbelief.  
  
"Geez," muttered the co pilot. "Some people just really hate us Hollywood folk."  
  
"Yeah," said the scout shaking his head, "Look at them waving at us to move on. Guess  
  
this location is NOT the one for us. We''ll take it off the list of islands to land in and  
  
check out."  
  
"Good thinking," responded the co pilot, "we dont want the natives to get restless."  
  
The plane continued on to the next island in sight as the cast aways stared in disbelief.  
  
"Why arent they stopping?" Ginger moaned.  
  
Professor turned to look at the logs.   
  
"Looks like we told them where to go alright," The professor concluded with his hands  
  
to his hips.  
  
Everyone turned to see the flaming Hollywood Hell sign.  
  
"Gilligannnnnn!" they all shouted, lunging toward the island bafoon.  
  
The sun set as Gilligan once again ran to keep a distance until tempers' flare was put out. 


End file.
